i guess it is safe fur mich to write here. since nobody truly looks at this page and it is way safer than myspace oder facebook. entonces i will escribir aqui. i guess i have a lot on my mind. working now. yeahhhh moi. well i love it there. im in college working towards my degree. that alone freaks me out. it shows that i am growing up and i am not that little kid any more. i've changed. im no longer that little kid. i just dont know how to write esos palabras in palabras but i wll try my mejor. I just relized that hay sentirse para john. no lo se pero i do. it hurts b/c i cant get him out of mi mente. idk, i still care for him but i want wat is best for him, i want him 2 be happy whether it is with me or with somebody else, i just want him to be contento con su life. i want to be happy, i want to be content but i dk if i ever will truly be happy. whatever.